For those who cheated...what would have stopped you and when?

I read a post here not long ago where a husband had caught his wife in the early beginnings of an EA, and he "stomped it out" and saved his marriage.

To those that cheated and took it to fruition, could you have been stopped before that at an earlier stage had your BS been on top of things, confronted you early, and put a stop to it before it got that far?

Excepting the "one night stand" that "just happens", we seem to see alot of posts here where there are so many red flags that are missed and not seen as red flags until it's too late. Or the WS blew them off as "nothing" or the BS being "paranoid" or "controlling".

I do trust my W, but I also seem to have this sense of hyper vigilance. If I see a red flag, I'm all over it like a monkey on a peanut. I may not necessarily ask about it or confront, but any real red flag puts my radar on high, and I start looking to see if there's anything to it. So far, thankfully, there hasn't been. Hope there never is.

Good way to live? I don't know, I'm happy not having any real doubts. Sure, they have come and gone a couple times with some pretty big flags, but they've come to be nothing as far as cheating goes.

My W and I had talked about this. She, on the other hand, just likes to trust completely. And I get that. But, is that mentality bad? Does that not leave room for an affair to blossum and grow to a point where it can be too late? Whereas had "one eye been open", something could have been quashed early on?

Source: http://talkaboutmarriage.com/coping-infidelity/52775-those-who-cheated-what-would-have-stopped-you-when.html

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